Wow. What a day. I am exhausted. I hate fighting. I hate meanness. I don't understand why kindness can't prevail. As I say this, yes I do ... read what I wrote this morning. Satan really attacked us today and we let him win. I'm disgusted. I feel completely defeated right now ... but I know I am not. Feelings are so tricky sometimes. And now I'm sick to my stomach. Literally. I made dinner but I don't think I can eat any of it. My poor kids ... what a day for them today. I'm so sad. I think it is a night to play yahtzee with them and to relax ... Kyle can join in if he wants. I need to love on them. And I need someone to love on me ... the kiddies can do that. The madness of hurting the people we claim to love has to stop. It has to. We are all going to spend all of our time defeating each other and never furthering the Kingdom. I mean Me, Kyle, everyone who fights who claims to love the Lord. It is madness. It is letting Satan have more than a foothold. It is just WRONG. I don't want to let him beat me ... Satan ... he's disgusting. Lord, please reign in my home ... may we seek your face all day and all night! May we love each other desperately. May we seek only to lift one another up. Help me to lose the defensiveness and bitterness. Control Kyle's temper. We are hurting each other and it must stop. It is so vicious. And I'm so tired. God, please heal our home. Make our home a place of rest. I know you can heal this and use it to your glory ... Lord, I'm begging you to intervene in our hearts. We must love with YOUR love.